Eat, poop, sleep. Eat, poop, sleep. Eat, poop, sleep. Repeat. Repeat. REPEAT! Oh gosh I know they are soooo adorable, but when can I start having FUN with them? When can I start being a REAL grandma?
I sure remember those days! I occupied non-babysitting hours warehousing empty-nest bedrooms with toys that those little cherubs wouldn't be old enough to enjoy for years! I bought a United States wall map for a three-month-new infant so she would be the very first to know her states and capitals before pre-school. I bought wiggle eyes, glue, yarn, and blunt-point elephant-shaped scissors for the twins when they were one-month-young so I'd be ready when it was time for them to make sock puppets. A deluxe school play set (okay, okay....TWO deluxe school play sets!) have waited patiently in my closet for over a year and I don't have the heart to tell them they won't be coming out as birthday gifts for another three!
Yeah, I know. My sons-in-law have already given me the same look you have on your face right now!
What I was doing was pathetic, but it didn't stop until I developed an outlet for the "fun" I wanted to have with the grandbabies, discovering that all I needed was my camera, an ounce of cleverness, and an email list of everyone who has ever made the mistake of asking me, "So, what's new with you?"
When your grandchildren are just the cutest little things ever, all you want to do anyway is follow them around and take pictures. If you are persistent enough, you will capture enough material to take home, upload, and use to compose a series of "baby narrated" tutorials to email to everyone in the world! Then, sit back and wait for the accolades, because they will come!
This was my first in a series of "Tutorials by Brielle."
The pictures were taken when she was about ten months old.
"How to Properly Brush Your Teeth"
1. Examine the device carefully. Make sure that it really IS a toothbrush!
2. Measure the Bristles!
3. Compare bristle length and width to the size of your mouth. Caution! Do not use toothbrush if it is larger than the inside of your mouth!
4. Brush carefully! Even in areas where you don't have teeth!
5. When you are done brushing, throw toothbrush away!
6. Then, complain loudly that you don't have a toothbrush!
7. When you get it back, toss toothbrush away again!
There! How easy was that? Now you know how to properly brush your teeth!
Little Miss Smarty-Diapers,
Here's another one! It documents Bree's ongoing battle with two family cats who are determined to occupy her play tunnel. Pets who are allowed to interact with your grandkids supply wonderful candid material!
"How to Effectively Flush Rodents From Your Play Tunnel"
1. See this? It is WARM in this spot! That is proof that a "rodent" has been here recently and may very well return!
2. Shhhh! There's one now! Lucky for me it's the Black and White Spotted variety! Those tend to be friendlier and less unpredictable than the Grey Tiger species* who often opt to stay and fight back!
3. I am pretty sure I can get this one to move out with a friendly greeting and a polite request!
4. There! Mission Accomplished! But don't you ever forget! I've got my eye on you!
* The "Grey Tiger species" was mentioned above. For the record, here he sits, striking a handsome "Jabba the Hutt" pose while boldly occupying my high chair in broad daylight! His smug look of "Trump-ian" arrogance is well deserved - he has just anointed himself "Salesman of the Year" for the very lucrative pacifier theft ring he operates out of our home! As you can imagine, flushing him from my play tunnel is not the easiest task to accomplish, although it can, and has been done by lil ole me on numerous occasions!
And there you have it! No more excuses for allowing RODENTS to burrow inside your play tunnel and refuse to leave!
Little Miss Smarty-Diapers,
Now, if you'd like to see more, hop on over to this post! Thank you for stopping by!